This morning, as I scrolled through my Facebook feed, I came across a post that made me pause. It read, “Hapwa kana ichinhuwa kuma to 7 kuno kokuzoti kuma past 4,” poking fun at body odour and how it gets worse throughout the day. At first, I chuckled. It seemed like a harmless, light-hearted comment, something many of us would laugh at.

However, something hit me; What if this is not funny to everyone? It was not just a passing thought, it was a gut check, a sudden awareness that our words may be causing more hurt than we realized. What many of us think as light-hearted comments could actually be adding to someone’s burden.

We have all been there, making a joke about something that does not affect us, not realizing how those words might land. It is easy to laugh when the problem is far from our own experience, when we have access to things like deodorant or perfume, things that mask what we consider a minor inconvenience. However, for others, body odour, and many of the other struggles we joke about, is a real, personal challenge. It could be tied to their health, their finances, or situations beyond their control. It is easy to joke when we do not fully understand the weight. The truth is, making light of someone else’s pain can be harmful, even if that is never our intention.

If I take body odour for instance, you will discover that many times it is not just about hygiene. For many, it is tied to something deeper. Some may be dealing with serious health conditions like hyperhidrosis or hormonal imbalances. Others may be facing difficult living conditions, long hours of hard work, lack of clean water, or being unable to afford basic hygiene products. These are not just problems people can easily fix, and they certainly are not things people choose. However, when we make jokes about things like body odour, we often forget these realities. We laugh from a place of privilege, unaware that what seems like a small inconvenience to us might be a daily struggle for someone else and our jokes, however innocent they seem, can make the struggle feel even heavier.

I make jokes too, and it was worse back in the day when I did not really think about the impact of my words. Guess we all learn something new each day that improves the person we are. I once worked in a call center, and when the day ended without meeting targets, we would tease each other by saying, “Enda pachirongwa shamwari or nhasi wakanganwa kunwa mapiritsi that is why watadza kubata target” (You need to be on the HIV treatment program or you forgot to take your pills, that is why you missed the target). It became almost routine for people to joke this way. To many of us, it seemed like harmless banter. What seemed like a funny comment to us was a painful reminder for someone else, one they could not escape. When one is already carrying something as heavy as that, the last thing they need is to be reminded of it in a way that feels like a joke. Those words may have been light-hearted to us, but they carried a huge weight.

A Better Way Forward

We live in a world where so much is hidden from view. Many of the struggles people face are invisible to most of us. They are many battles being fought quietly, day in and day out. Instead of joking at the expense of others, let us choose to lift them up.

Let us stop and ask ourselves; Will this joke make someone feel better, or will it make them feel worse? How would I feel if this was about me? When we have a choice to be kind, let us take it. We have the power to change the tone of the conversation, to shift the culture, and to create spaces where everyone feels seen, heard, and respected.

Let us remember that laughter is a great gift, but it should never come at someone else’s expense. When we choose empathy over humor, we choose to create a world where people feel safe to be themselves. The next time we are about to laugh at something that could hurt, let us pause. Let us reflect. Let us make a conscious choice to speak with kindness, to be a little gentler with each other, and to remember that our words have the power to heal or to harm. In the end, we all have enough to carry without adding to someone else’s load. Let us be the ones who help make life a little easier for each other.

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